Stories by JL Johnson

Managing Correspondent - Lee's Summit, MO. JL joined AirlineReporter in 2012 and has since become one of our most tenured and prolific writers. He enjoys catalyzing AvGeek excitement in others, and semi-frequent travel. While he's always looking for the next big adventure, home is with his growing AvGeek family in Lee's Summit, MO, a suburb of Kansas City. Find JL on MastodonEmail: jl@airlinereporter.com

https://vmst.io/@User47
AvGeek To-Do: Fly Porter. - Photo: Caribb (CC BY-NC-ND 2.0)

I have a dirty little secret to share. I made it around the sun 30 times before stopping to pick up a passport. For most of my adult life I could easily explain this away: “My airline doesn’t fly internationally.” Then came the May, 2011 announcement that Southwest would acquire AirTran, and as a result would become an international carrier. Fast forward a few years and AirTran had been fully integrated into Southwest, yet I was still without a magic blue book. What seemed to be my last valid excuse (aside from pure laziness) was gone. It was time to join the majority of my AvGeek brethren (and 35% of the U.S. population) in securing a passport.

At a dinner, with fellow AvGeeks, a friend of mine who recently interned with an airline in Chicago mentioned that he had applied for, and received a same-day passport in downtown Chicago just hours before he took his first non-rev trip abroad. I was intrigued. I had discovered a way to make a task I had put off for years more interesting than filling out paperwork and sitting around for weeks waiting for a response. Not only that, I now had a completely valid excuse to board a LUV bird to jet up to Chicago for a day trip. I was fully on board for a same-day passport challenge.

A Spirit Airlines Airbus A-321 wearing the Bare Fare livery at TPA. Photo- JL Johnson | AirlineReporter

I paid a mere $16.11 for a one-way Spirit Airlines Bare Fare flight from Kansas City to Dallas. Crazy, right? It gets crazier… $14.24 of that ticket went to the “Government’s Cut,” (Spirit’s words, not mine) that is, various government-imposed fees and taxes. Of the remainder, a single penny went towards the base fare, with the final $1.86 going to what Spirit refers to as “Unintended Consequences of DOT Regulations.” Depending on where you sit on the regulatory fence, the actual revenue from my Bare Fare was either a penny or $1.87.

Either way, the airline was bound to make money off of me from their various fees, right? After all, that’s what Spirit is known for: evil fees. But, what if I went totally bare and instead just paid only for “ass plus gas” (again, Spirit’s words, not mine)? Do people actually do that? I did… for science.